music certainly has changed. there are some talented artist out but at the same time some really make you go wtf. this is just my opinion on some of the popular entertainers out now
nicki minaj- nicki as a brand is amazing. whoever ever her A&R people are they knew what they were doing. she may be a biter or whatever but its not who did it first its who did it best. she took this whole barbie thing and made herself a household name. she inspired a generation of girls to walk out of the house looking like some damn fools but spread her name which is the goal of any artist.her style is outlandish def stands out from watered down artist who allow themselves to be constantly photographed in cookie cutter dresss lyrically ehhhh im not the biggest minaj fan. she is on my list of women id smash, but im not gonna spend any money on her album. while she def does manage to deliver some good one liners im not really impressed by her predicate/subject brand of young money rap. as a makeup addict i love her makeup she can go from semi natural to old hollywood to futuristic candy coated. but i see longevity in her
drake- wheelchair jimmy.....drake is lil wayne's avatar. he beside nicki is the only member of young money who seems to have the labels support. he has a major fan base that is extremely loyal and helped him to become best new artist just from the strength of his mixtapes. i forsee him being around for quite awhile. im not a major fan but hes entertaining enough. his lyrical content is a nice stray from the wasted gunplay that is so popular from most southern rappers who he is clearly heavily influenced by (even if he looks like a toe with eyebrows)
gucci mane- i really dont know what to say about him. hes uber popular but has limited rhyming skills. he is the definition of a rapper in that he is strictly an entertainer. he goes to jail everytime he releases an album and that only helps to boost his popularity. most of his fanbase enoys four loko and kush and probably went to everest college. his music sounds good as hell when youre drunk at 2am but dont look for any deep meaning in his lyrics. just get wasted and enjoy
wale- love love love him. great artist but dont ever come for kanye again sir
the dream- all his albums sound the same, but they are all great. great beats and production coupled with baby making lyrics make him a noticed r&b singer even though his voice isnt much, there are few genuine r&b singers around nowadays. he doesnt have the sex symbol factor but his music def puts you in the mood
janelle monae- gorgeous woman with a beautiful voice. she has range and lyrical content. unfortunately she will never be as popular as she deserves that entertainment for you
roscoe dash- kill yourself
those teach me how to jerk niggas- see roscoe dash
im sure im missing some people but ive given up on popular culture
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
randoms
things i like
-food
-makeup
-pandora
-shopping
-children
-reading
-coffee
-twitter
-alcohol
things i hate
-facebook
-crazy bible thumpers
-silence
-scary movies
-people who drive slow
-food
-makeup
-pandora
-shopping
-children
-reading
-coffee
-alcohol
things i hate
-crazy bible thumpers
-silence
-scary movies
-people who drive slow
im officially a hater and big enough to admit it
i am officially a joe budden hater!!! first tahiry then esther baxter???? esther baxter is number one on my finest women alive list i would do horrible things to get with this woman and this no album havin ass nigga has smashed both?? as my good friend pointed out he has several mixtapes; in the words of the kang of the south T.I. "fuck a mixtape!" tahiry is number 5 on my list because her face isnt much but her ass has enough meat to feed a small island nation for several months.and you know what he beat the crap outta her. i hope the same doesnt happen to esther she is to beautiful to deal with such pain. oh well it wont last long. at least my number 4 maliah scored drake (SN: he his lil waynes avatar, as soon as weezy went to jail aka sleep in that little tube thing drake took his place) and according the gossip websites a house from the deal. and my number 2 amber rose has adorable baby faced reggie bush that big mountain of man chocolate. in case you havent noticed there is a theme in the type of women i like.....ASS. (my number 2 is nicki minaj couldnt leave her out since i mentioned the others)
Sunday, August 15, 2010
She told her homegurl
so this post is gonna be a tad bit explicit.....its about the ding ding. its not something i indulge in (well sometimes but thats a completely different story) many of my friends are straight and i get to hear hilarious stories about their escapades with men. one of the biggest things that always comes up (no pun intended) is dick size. ive heard stories about everything from baby dicks to loch ness monsters. beware of sending dick pics because she is going to show her friends. ive seen ashy ones, hairy one, turtleneck ones....just gross there is a reason i only eat fish (hee hee)
size is a major factor. a man may be a grower not a shower meaning when soft its not much to look at but when that blood starts rushing watch out now....or he may just be big all around. his trouser snake is vicious in any state. and then there are those sad individuals who are cursed with a wee willy winky. i think the ideal is a man who looks like a baby arm making a fist sometimes you can judge a man by his walk (idris elba) they have something my mom likes to call the gorilla walk. he slopes like a gorilla because the shear size of his man meat is weighing him down. men who cross their legs at the knee like women.....well yea they tend to not always be winners in that department. but looks can be decieving. a man may not seem like much but when you get him to business he will put it in your life like christmas.
but just because a man has a big appendage it doesnt necessarily mean he knows how to use it. his stroke may be weak or he has absolutely no technique. and the man with the average dick may have you crawling up the walls shouting bible verses in japanese (SN: i once had some head so good i went cross eyed and they got stuck for like 10 seconds no lie) but its not always the size of the boat the motion of the ocean does matter. if a man has just an average dick he probably has developed more techniques on how to work a woman over than an a man with wizard dick (big, magic get it?) they tend to rely on the fact that when they put it in you can feel it in you kidneys rather than knowing what to do with it. stroke length and strength do matter.
i really didnt have a point to this. i just wanted to laugh at the fact that my friend recently told me she entered into an encounter with a man and his johnson johnson was as long as the tip of her finger. i have experimented with men outta curiosity and needless to say i was less than impressed. the dick has too many varying factors that can end up being a surprise and ruin the whole night.
*safe sex is great sex better use a latex cuz you dont want that late text that i think im late text* regardless of the size you should make sure the jimmy is extra tight. unprotected sex should be considered a form of suicide. everytime you have have unprotected sex you are playing russian roulette and you dont wanna get the bullet. so make sure you buy the appropriate condoms there is nothing worse or funnier than a baggy condom. you should know by now if youre a gold wrapper nigga. if not please hit that regular trojan and call it day. slipage is no joke and those things will caught in a woman and that is an awkward situation. also you dont want it too tight cut off all the circulation to the dick and fuck around and pass out that would def ruin the moment. random but some funny hood shit would be if the man had on a baggy condom and had to rubberband it to make it tighter around his hammerhead bwaahahaha
also which is better short and thick or long and skinny. i figure short and thick because you can feel it and he can have a longer stroke, but idk when it comes from the store and is attached to a sexy ass stud you get the best of both worlds
TTFN
update: im still toothless about to go gum this bbq
size is a major factor. a man may be a grower not a shower meaning when soft its not much to look at but when that blood starts rushing watch out now....or he may just be big all around. his trouser snake is vicious in any state. and then there are those sad individuals who are cursed with a wee willy winky. i think the ideal is a man who looks like a baby arm making a fist sometimes you can judge a man by his walk (idris elba) they have something my mom likes to call the gorilla walk. he slopes like a gorilla because the shear size of his man meat is weighing him down. men who cross their legs at the knee like women.....well yea they tend to not always be winners in that department. but looks can be decieving. a man may not seem like much but when you get him to business he will put it in your life like christmas.
but just because a man has a big appendage it doesnt necessarily mean he knows how to use it. his stroke may be weak or he has absolutely no technique. and the man with the average dick may have you crawling up the walls shouting bible verses in japanese (SN: i once had some head so good i went cross eyed and they got stuck for like 10 seconds no lie) but its not always the size of the boat the motion of the ocean does matter. if a man has just an average dick he probably has developed more techniques on how to work a woman over than an a man with wizard dick (big, magic get it?) they tend to rely on the fact that when they put it in you can feel it in you kidneys rather than knowing what to do with it. stroke length and strength do matter.
i really didnt have a point to this. i just wanted to laugh at the fact that my friend recently told me she entered into an encounter with a man and his johnson johnson was as long as the tip of her finger. i have experimented with men outta curiosity and needless to say i was less than impressed. the dick has too many varying factors that can end up being a surprise and ruin the whole night.
*safe sex is great sex better use a latex cuz you dont want that late text that i think im late text* regardless of the size you should make sure the jimmy is extra tight. unprotected sex should be considered a form of suicide. everytime you have have unprotected sex you are playing russian roulette and you dont wanna get the bullet. so make sure you buy the appropriate condoms there is nothing worse or funnier than a baggy condom. you should know by now if youre a gold wrapper nigga. if not please hit that regular trojan and call it day. slipage is no joke and those things will caught in a woman and that is an awkward situation. also you dont want it too tight cut off all the circulation to the dick and fuck around and pass out that would def ruin the moment. random but some funny hood shit would be if the man had on a baggy condom and had to rubberband it to make it tighter around his hammerhead bwaahahaha
also which is better short and thick or long and skinny. i figure short and thick because you can feel it and he can have a longer stroke, but idk when it comes from the store and is attached to a sexy ass stud you get the best of both worlds
TTFN
update: im still toothless about to go gum this bbq
Saturday, August 14, 2010
fuckin foreigners, pork, and no homo
ok i am in no way a xenophobe i love to travel but foreigners fuck these not english speaking *beep* who come into my store and ask me 305953732 questions but then say oh im sorry "i no speaky a english"... why theeee fawk did you ask me then????????? and also wash your ass before you come to try on clothes. i dont know about your country but in america we bathe everyday and use deodorant (well most of us) i am sick and tired of having to refold clothes that smell like a hot bag of fuckyoumean. and american white ppl you have to use lotion just like everyone else. white people will put on flip flops in a minute but their heels look like a damn loaf of rye bread. crispy crunchy....vaseline your life and let it marinate
i love pork...it is my friend and yours too. all these countries that have had war for thousands of years.. israel/ palastine, most african nations, farrakhan...theyre mad and in distress because they dont have the swine in their life. get a pulled pork sandwich and call it a day.
one of my favorite shows is The Boondocks. satire at its finest, americas dirty laundry animated. one of my fave episodes is the episode "Pause" which makes fun of the Tyler Perry franchise. what bugged me about it was the overuse of the phrases no homo and pause. if you say something that requires the use of these phrases guess what its gay it doesnt mean you are it just means you said some borderline homosexual shit. and the more concerned you are about not appearing gay guess what people are gonna think youre gay....speaking of gay why do so many gay men have bad breath. i love my booty bandits but some of yall breath be smelling like a hot bag of ass cheeks....i can see the little lamasil foot fungus monster running around in your mouth....jesus and a rich white man invented toothpaste for a reason
i love pork...it is my friend and yours too. all these countries that have had war for thousands of years.. israel/ palastine, most african nations, farrakhan...theyre mad and in distress because they dont have the swine in their life. get a pulled pork sandwich and call it a day.
one of my favorite shows is The Boondocks. satire at its finest, americas dirty laundry animated. one of my fave episodes is the episode "Pause" which makes fun of the Tyler Perry franchise. what bugged me about it was the overuse of the phrases no homo and pause. if you say something that requires the use of these phrases guess what its gay it doesnt mean you are it just means you said some borderline homosexual shit. and the more concerned you are about not appearing gay guess what people are gonna think youre gay....speaking of gay why do so many gay men have bad breath. i love my booty bandits but some of yall breath be smelling like a hot bag of ass cheeks....i can see the little lamasil foot fungus monster running around in your mouth....jesus and a rich white man invented toothpaste for a reason
fuck jimmy johns
my fat ass chipped my tooth on a jimmy johns sandwich today....it was one of my porcelain veneers that ive had since i was 13 and needless to say im pissed...fuck them and that delicious ass sandwich
irrational fears
being the unusual person i am i have irrational fears. my biggest fear is midgets. idk what is is the big heads, the sausagy arms, the big booties ( why do midgets be having donks?) but something about them creeps me all the way out. they should have to carry signs that say hey im down here dont look because that surprise when you walk up on one and then all of a sudden look down and see one will make you piss on yourself. its biblical satan came to this earth as a serpent body slithering on the ground whos closer to the ground than a midget......message
sheep.....they are not normal or natural.....i was attacked by one when i was a child....thats all i have to say about that
i cant think of anymore but there are a lot of random ass things that freak me out...i like snakes and spiders but a midget will get me a stroke
sheep.....they are not normal or natural.....i was attacked by one when i was a child....thats all i have to say about that
i cant think of anymore but there are a lot of random ass things that freak me out...i like snakes and spiders but a midget will get me a stroke
alcohol
i wanted to change the name of this blog to cocktails and cupcakes but oh well so i figure let me talk about one of my favorite things......alcohol! ever since i turned 21 i can do it legally but ive loved the bottle for awhile. im not like an alcoholic or anything but i am a college student which may be the first step. my good friend rachie poo is a bartender so this has only help to facilitate the process.
my issue is that sometimes bad things happen when i drink...ive found random girls underwear and not been able to connect the dots. some of my friends have ended up naked or lost because they indulged a little too much. either way it leads to bad things. the only thing i dont like about liquor is that if drunk enough ill turn straight *bbm embarrassed face* the craziest moment i can remember right now is on a friend of mines 21st birthday she took 21 shots and still cant remember what happened that night. also i vividly remember a night at the worst most ghetto club ever, the now defunct nitro in which a friend ended up in the bathroom. all this to say its ok to be drunk as long as you keep it classy. nothing worst than seeing someone publicly passed out. save it for the car or until you get home. also drunk hookups are dangerous. when a chick shows up at your door with a baby who has your ears or youre at the clinic with....the package... you are literally fucked.
my new fave drink is Skyy X-Rated is a fruity vodka type thingy v.v. good. i also love passion fruit skyy yummers. if you see me in the club buy me a malibu bay breeze and ill be your best friend
drink responsibly....wrap your weiner....bottoms up
my issue is that sometimes bad things happen when i drink...ive found random girls underwear and not been able to connect the dots. some of my friends have ended up naked or lost because they indulged a little too much. either way it leads to bad things. the only thing i dont like about liquor is that if drunk enough ill turn straight *bbm embarrassed face* the craziest moment i can remember right now is on a friend of mines 21st birthday she took 21 shots and still cant remember what happened that night. also i vividly remember a night at the worst most ghetto club ever, the now defunct nitro in which a friend ended up in the bathroom. all this to say its ok to be drunk as long as you keep it classy. nothing worst than seeing someone publicly passed out. save it for the car or until you get home. also drunk hookups are dangerous. when a chick shows up at your door with a baby who has your ears or youre at the clinic with....the package... you are literally fucked.
my new fave drink is Skyy X-Rated is a fruity vodka type thingy v.v. good. i also love passion fruit skyy yummers. if you see me in the club buy me a malibu bay breeze and ill be your best friend
drink responsibly....wrap your weiner....bottoms up
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